Memories

When I look back at the past six months, so much has happened. I have noticed that I have only written about the struggles and the low times and have neglected the good times. Deployments suck, you are away from family and friends, facing the unknown. Granted my family isn’t here, but I do have friends. These friends have made the last six months bearable. Many frustrating days and flights, but lots of laughs and great memories. I am so grateful for my family and friends who have supported me throughout this journey and for the new friends I’ve met here. You all have made this deployment memorable and I can’t wait to see you all back in the states when our paths cross, the Air Force is small. I will take away from this deployment some growing up on my part, but the memories of the great people I’ve met. No pants dance for me, Mango Juice, almost getting hit by the poop truck, Tran and Garey’s KAF Adventure, staying up talking, Listen Here Mister…, Coffee dates, Van rides, Kabob House, Blue Line Ops, Eating ice cream while watching people run at the boardwalk, Mirc. Truc, Lauren, Danielle, Heather, Steph, Sarah, Cari and the Boys, thank you for the memories and the friendship. See ya on the flip side! PANCAKES! (just for you Tran). To my family and friends, I’M COMING HOME!!!!

In Time

It's been awhile since I've written anything. I think it is partly because I've been in this internal struggle that if I ignore long enough it would go away. Truth is they just sink deeper and deeper into my being. Somedays I think it would just be easier to revert back to my old ways. I know there are people waiting for me to fall back into that life and laugh and tell me they told me so. But in truth I don't think I would be happy with who that would make me as a person. But in turn I don't believe I'm truly happy with where I am at right now. This has nothing to do with my physical location, granted it sucks, but my mental, spiritual and emotional being are not in line. First off I'm not depressed, mom stop worrying. I think I just need to start figuring out what kind of person I want to be and where that takes me. Right now Eyes Open by Taylor Swift explains exactly how I feel right now. I guess all I am trying to say is I'm confused and trying to figure it out.

KONY 2012

Take the time to watch. You won't regret it!

To My Oki Family

I was running today, you know that thing I have a love hate relationship with. While running and having my work out mix blaring in my head phones Family Force Five came on and I was all smiles. It brought me back to the times of rocking out in the B9 van and got me thinking about all the good times. Driving around Oki with Hannah listening to All Sons and Daughters talking about lyrics and life. Hanging out with Grace and having conversations that I would never expect to have with a high school study, very wise beyond her years. Listening to Worth Dying For with Jessica in a van getting ready to go to Faithful Heart in Thailand. Rocking out to T-Swizzle and Miley with the B9s, Sarah, Michael, Serina, and Dan. I love how music reminds you of the good things in life. To my Oki family I miss you all and love you guys! I can't wait to rock with everyone when I come home. Oh and Sarah, have the Beibs ready! Much Love!

Write Something

It has been awhile since my last post. Not much has been going on and honestly I think that is a problem. Work is keeping me busy, but at the same time I still have free time. I don't think I am using my time wisely. There is plenty that I need to do so I can achieve my goals and finish some of the things I've started. I know that is very vague but I don't know how else to explain it. In other news I will be debt free as of March 18, which has been about 5 years in the making. Yes I will be partaking in a near beer and pizza on that day. That's all I have for now, I'm off to finish to my book and tea.

Been Awhile

It's been awhile since my last post, partly because the morale net was down and that is the only way I can post my blog. But the main reason, I didn't have much to write. Not much goes on when you are deployed. You work, eat, work out, and sleep. Sometimes you see your friends and get to say more than hi in passing and other times you get to settle down and read a good book. It is an exciting life let me tell you.

In the time that has past I've continued my quest through the NT and came across this which I find crazy cause I taught on this passage about 8 months ago and totally skim over this:

Ephesians 5:19,20 "addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart, giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ."

Now I don't really get the addressing one another in psalms and hymns part, but bear with m e and if you do understand please help me to. The part of this passage that hit home is "making melody to the Lord with your heart, giving thanks always and everything to God." This goes back to the heart issue I mentioned before. But am I giving praise to my lord with my heart? Granted I can't carry a tune to save my life, but I know my heart sure can. I am coming to the realization that "making a melody to the Lord with your heart" with then translate in how you speak Luke 6:45 "The good person out of the good treasure of his heart produces good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure produces evil, for out of the abundance of the heart his mouth speaks." Crazy how a heart issue becomes a mouth issue...

"Give Thanks always for everything to God.." Wow! How many times have I only thanked God for getting me out of the mess I put myself in, but throughout the whole ordeal I blamed him? Or if things are going great I take credit for it and not realize the blessings being poured into my life are from God? I find it very humbling that I tend to thank God when things go according to my plans and when they don't I complain and ask God why. I am pretty sure I am not the only one who has a hard time giving thanks always and for everything especially in the hard times. I got really frustrated when I found out I was deploying and for how long I would be gone for. In fact I dragged my feet because upon my return people who I care about would no longer live in Okinawa and I missed the past year with them. Looking back at the past 6 months I can see the blessings that this deployment has brought. I got to spend quality time with my good friends in Oklahoma, who I hadn't seen in 2 years. Spent Thanksgiving with my family and had the joys of spending time with my family besides my bro, who I will see when I get back. And even here in lovely Afghanistan I am building lasting friendships. So even though I wasn't thankful for everything in the beginning, I can see the melody in my heart changing and yes giving thanks always and for everything. I will leave you with this: How can my mouth/words worship and give thanks to God if my heart is not?

Song: Spirit Speaks-All Sons & Daughters and I wonder-Leeland

Boldness

I just finished reading through Acts and it is crazy how bold they were in the beginning of our church history. There was a real threat of life and death but they still shared the Gospel. Our threat now-a-days in most areas of the world is a matter of our friends liking us, or just people in general accepting us. Crazy how we as people would prefer the acceptance of those around us than God's. That blows my mind. On the day I will stand before God for judgement, which will happen. I don't want to hear you had a lot of friends or people in general like you, but way to run the race. This is something I need to pray about because I think when it comes to this area of my life I tend to keep quiet instead of speaking up. I need to be bold or as Beth Moore has said "Don't Wimp Out!"